Team Fox

Yay for hormonal waterworks! sometimes I feel like I need to drink an extra glass of water per day just to avoid dehydration by crying. Anything can trigger waterworks, oftentimes it’s the unlikely stuff. Hubby took me to watch Sex and the City 2 for my birthday and I stayed dry during the whole chick flick but I couldn’t say the same about the Google commercial that played during the previews.

Another common thing I deal with is what a former coworker calls the “pregnancy dumbs” and is usually referred to in the internet as “placenta brain”.  I sometimes feel like instead of making his/her own neurons baby is just stealing mine.  It is now the norm for me to have to turn around at the driveway when leaving the house because I forgot something.

I keep getting annoyed at the amount of solicitation and coupons that I get from formula companies.  While commercial infant formulas are commonly perceived to be the medically recommended second choice infant food after breastfeeding, the World Health Organization (WHO) states: “The second choice is the mother’s own milk expressed and given to the infant in some way. The third choice is the milk of another human mother. The fourth and last choice is artificial baby milk.”

The fourth choice people! Then why do so many women automatically default to formula as their first and second choice? I’ve heard a variety of excuses from several moms I have met and they just made me want to cry and scream at the same time.  It’s so hard to not climb on the soapbox on them for this one!

I am a formula fed baby, and although I don’t know what excuse my mother used to not breastfeed (we’re not close enough for me to consider asking), I have a feeling that it was the common society “perception” of baby feeding at the time and expensive formula company marketing.

People say “but look at you, you turned out fine!“, I may have but I also can’t help but wonder how much better I would have turned out, how much healthier I would have been while growing up, how much closer I could be to my mother if I had been breastfed. Although I don’t blame my parents for their decisions, they were doing what they felt was best at the time; I can’t help but feel shortchanged and that’s a feeling that I don’t want my baby to grow up with.

On the progress front, we have finally settled down on a name choice for both gender scenarios.  One name had been pretty much chosen for months, I just had to grow into it, and the other one was just a matter of selecting from 2 finalists. Credit for both names goes to Daddy Fox, he seems to have a stronger opinion on the subject than I did.  And no, we’re not telling what the names are…

I do have a belly picture to post this week (technically it’s the bump at week 32) and when I look at it all I can say is… I’m huge!

I have given up on wearing sneakers, I did pretty good at being able to tie my own shoes for longer than my pregnant friends and technically I still can but that entails finding creative angles and positions to reach them which usually result in a tiny foot under a rib so I’m sticking to sandals now.

I am already starting to get the “haven’t you popped yet?” questions, I’ve never understood that one,  does it look like I have?

The look on peoples faces when I tell them I still have 7 weeks to go, obviously they think I should be having this kid tomorrow.

Since it’s been a while since I’ve posted a list of pet peeves, in addition to the popping question here I have the latest ones…

- People who say, “Your lives are going to change!“  Thanks for the newsflash.

- Men that think they know more about pregnancy than I do because their wives went through it.  Really?  You might know a lot, but you don’t know what it feels like, so shut it.

-”You look so good now.  You should try not to lose all the baby weight.“   I didn’t realize I looked so bad before!

- “You look exhausted” … no kidding, just wait and you’ll see me wearing a whole new level of exhaustion soon.

Internet pregnancy forums tend to have these “due date clubs” for people that are all due at around the same time.  It’s weird to see so many July due babies being born already, agh!  That seems to be my biggest reminder that the light at the end of the tunnel is no longer a dot!

It shocks and amazes me how much ignorance is out there and how much damage it is doing.  I have added the Craigslist Baby stuff for sale RSS feed to my Google Reader for about a week now, I haven’t come across anything I’ve wanted to buy yet but something I do notice is the large amount of recalled products that are posted for sale and I cringe to think at how many unsuspecting people innocently buy these.

I’ve also discovered a LOT of ignorance in whom I would have considered experienced mothers.  For example at work I talked briefly to a woman pregnant with her second baby that had no idea that ultrasounds were optional if there were no complications.

Or the mother of 3 that didn’t know that homebirth is an option.  And don’t get me started on the lame excuses that I’ve heard for why they had a C-section.

When I come across these people I just shake my head and lament.  I don’t expect everyone to be as research minded as I am but when something as major as pregnancy and motherhood presents itself in your life I would have imagined that they would at least be interested in learning a little bit to make informed decisions instead of jumping on the bandwagon of doing what their doctor (oftentimes chosen for convenience of location/insurance coverage and not for merit) tells them.

And this is why quotes like this are scary, sad but true:  “Even though it’s neither an illness nor an injury, childbirth is the nation’s leading reason for hospitalization. It accounts for six of the 15 most commonly performed hospital procedures and $80 billion a year in hospital charges“  (Josephine Marcotty,  Star Tribune)

Moving on to brighter subjects, baby seems to have gotten mommy’s sense of rhythm with some dance moves that almost seem choreographed to music I can’t hear.  It’s super cute… except when I’m trying to drive.

On funny stuff, a website held a contest for a homemade video explaining why people should use cloth diapers.  I have no idea who won the $1,000 prize but my favorite is this entry below.  I would love to see an ad like this on a shopping channel or late night tv someday…

As time starts to run short I start to think about the fact that I want to have a belly cast made and trying to decide about when and how to go about it.  I see overpriced kits online but it looks like I can get it done cheaply enough, I just don’t have the help for it as I can’t cast my own belly.  I have several friends in Miami that would be perfect for the project but I’m not motivated enough to spend the gas and battle I-95 for it.

I may end up having to break down and pay someone locally to do it.

And this week’s last funny…. I wouldn’t be surprise if I see this happening in a few months….

Dear United HealthCare,

I do appreciate you taking the time to call me to check on how my pregnancy is going. However just because I have had several Braxton Hicks contractions in the last 4 weeks is no reason for alarm, so please don’t tell me that I should call my doctor and head to the hospital or proceed to transfer me to the nurse hotline when I say that the contractions are normal and nothing to be worried about.

Perhaps you’ll want to consider offering some training to the phone representatives that you assign to call pregnant women on the same basic stuff that is covered in the pamphlet that you sent me by mail when you first found out I was pregnant, this will hopefully prevent them from trying to scare paranoid and ignorant pregnant women in the program about emergencies that are not there.

Sincerely,

Your insured member  (not by choice)

This letter above summarizes how I feel about my health insurance company, I give them points for effort in offering a Healthy Pregnancy program which I thought was a good idea at the time so I signed up. But have been disappointed to see how they will call me regularly for “follow up assessments” interrogating me about a long list of symptoms to see if my pregnancy is not healthy.

I work at a call center (and for a health insurance program at that) so I know that the training that these people get is minimal at best but I really wish that they weren’t trying to dig so hard for an excuse to transfer every caller to the nurse hotline, do they get a bonus for transfers?

Since they couldn’t find anything abnormal with my pregnancy, they determined that the “practice” contractions which are common and to be expected are signs of preterm labor ::rolls eyes::  I have obviously done more studying than these phone reps, plus I know my body and I can assure you, if I am not worried… neither should you.  I’ll call you when my practice contractions get a regular pattern getting closer together and stronger, then I’ll be ready to talk to your nurses.

On other controversial news… I have been called a lactivist!  Aka. breastfeeding activist, I take it as a great complement.  Yes, I have never breastfed but I do fully plan to.  I know that I’m not guaranteed a perfect experience and that is why I have armed myself with backup support for the unexpected.  My midwife is supportive of breastfeeding, I have been attending La Leche League Meetings, La Leche League counselors are just a phone call away, I have contact information for  a lactation consultant from the Health Department and my primary care physician is a breastfeeding specialist.  In addition to research I think that I have done everything in my power to follow through in my desire to breastfeed.

I wish that all new moms knew that there is so much help and support available, it saddens me so much when moms give up so easily because breastfeeding didn’t seem easy or didn’t happen automatically.  Or even worse, get discouraged by the social stigma that is placed on breastfeeding as perverted instead of natural.

I continue to be horrified by the over commercialization of the baby industry, I am sick of getting e-mails from Babies R Us offering overpriced things that baby doesn’t need.  I have unsubscribed from so much baby spam that my e-mail inbox is now losing weight while I am gaining it (more on that below).

I got a booklet of coupons from Publix Supermarket’s Baby Club and surprise, surprise! not a single coupon that is of any use to me.  It’s all discounts on disposable diapers and formula.  Sad.  What about some coupons for nursing pads? or nipple cream?

On the bump development front, I had a near freakout at my last prenatal appointment when I got on the scale and saw that I had gained 11 pounds in the last month!  That’s my largest weight gain this whole pregnancy, midwife is not concerned so neither am I.  I’m not bursting out of my pants or bras so I know that it’s all belly (and some water) weight.

Here I am 11 pounds heavier at 31 weeks…

One of the things that I love about my midwife is how she takes common pregnancy discomforts that a regular doctor would just dismiss as  ” normal” and actually points out why that discomfort is a good thing.  In this case my swelling, I’m having normal third trimester swelling, nothing to be worried about, just annoyed by. I have now learned that apparent the fact that my the cool design of my wedding band is etched on my finger is something to rejoice in.  This means that when I bleed as much as I’m supposed to after birth, I will not need an IV because I have enough fluids in my body.  Let’s get a yay! for one less needle!

Midwife is “guess-timating” that baby will be about 7.5 pounds at birth, given that she’s handled hundreds of bumps I tend to trust her judgment.  I’d rather have that than a giant 10 pounder unmedicated! lol

No, I can’t say I feel too good, I just found this funny.  I have gotten mostly used to the usual discomforts, I may not move as fast or get as much done at the house but life still goes on rather normally.

The energy has been gradually shifting towards preparation for baby Fox’s arrival.  Last week I oxy-cleaned and hosed down the used co-sleeper bassinet that I had purchased.  I have ordered the last of the prefold diapers needed for the infant stage.  Baby Fox is set diaper wise until at least 18 pounds.  I’m waiting for that last shipment to arrive so that I can prewash the whole stash and get it ready for use.  Still keeping my eyes open for a cheap used washer on Craigslist.

On the baby wearing update, apparently I have expensive taste in fabric.  I haven’t been back to Jo Ann’s yet (waiting for the next 40% coupon to arrive in the mail) but so far everything that I like elsewhere has such a high cost per yard that it’s actually cheaper to buy myself a ready made Moby Wrap or similar.    I keep checking out the local consignment stores for used wraps as they tend to have good deals, sadly I was stupid enough to delay in buying the Maya Wrap in my favorite pattern before it sold so I get to wait and see again.

I have started to gather the supplies needed for the homebirth, have almost everything in the list given by the midwife save for some minor miscellaneous items such as extra towels and bed sheets.

I have also started to finalize the detail of our birth plans, I use a plural term as I have written a birth plan for home and a separate document in case of an emergency transfer to the hospital.  Leave it to the geek to have 2 separate sets of bullet lists!

Our home visit appointment is less than a month away on June 21st and that will mark the beginning of weekly prenatal appointments and with it the knowledge that Baby Fox can choose to arrive at any time after that.  Talk about approaching the home stretch!

Somebody asked me if it takes me a long time to write each Bump Chronicle since they tend to be so in depth and usually long. I have no idea how long it takes me because I never write it one sitting. Do you really expect me to remember to talk about 10 different things at once?

Each entry is gradually written over the span of 1 week, as I feel the need to point out/comment/ rant about something I’ll write about it and save it as a non-published post until my next day off from work in which I usually publish the full entry.  I don’t have the attention span to spend 4 hours compiling an entry at once.

When I first moved to Port St Lucie I used to be amazed at how nice and courteous everybody is.  Coming from the dog eat dog environment of Miami, I wasn’t familiar with things such as customer service and somebody giving you the right of way just because.  Lately though I notice a more selfish environment out there, don’t know if it was always there and I just didn’t notice or if more people have moved up here from Miami after I did but I seem to notice it now that the bump is obvious.

People at stores will slam doors in my face, I don’t expect them to hold it and wait for me but if they obviously saw me approaching you can just let go of the door and let it work on closing itself.  Cars will accelerate when approaching the crosswalk that I am already in the middle of crossing as if they want to run me over.  People will light up their cigarettes right next to me when there’s plenty of open space where they can keep their cancer stick smoke away from my baby.  Old Navy customers don’t acknowledge the right of a bump to wear a bikini, I was repeatedly blocked or pushed while trying to look at the racks during their swimsuit sale, and no the store was not the least bit crowded.

I’m not trying to cry bump discrimination or anything but this is when I started to notice that pattern, very weird.

Last weekend we took our childbirth preparation class, it was a sort of labor bootcamp.  I did learn some things while in there but I am glad that I had done a lot of previous reading and research before hand as things were so rushed most things were just skimmed over and some (like birth plans) didn’t get covered at all.

Thankfully I’m pretty well informed about what a birth plan is and what mine will have, I just need to write it down.  And no I’m not going to be married to the birth plan and disappointed if labor and birth don’t go according to my preconceived notion.  To me a birth plan is like a wishlist, a sort of “if the universe allows, this is how I would like my birth experience to be”.

Something that I did learn from the class even though it was not part of the curriculum per se, is that I have an emotional wound that is not fully healed yet and I am glad that I got this recognition now and not on baby’s birthday.

One of the exercises we did was to submerge our hands in a bowl full of ice and water for 90 seconds to relate to the pain of a contraction.  As I did that, I started to freak out, not because of the physical pain, it freaking hurt but I was managing that just fine with my breathing but because the pain triggered a flashback memory of my emergency room visit for a miscarriage last year.  The emotional pain made the 90 seconds seem like an eternity and it was nearly impossible to hold back from crying in this room full of people.

Knowing this now lets me know that I definitely need to schedule that EFT session soon and this is the first blockage to tackle before I go into labor.  This is now on my to do list as soon as I have the spare money for it.  As I had mentioned on an earlier bump post, EFT helped me tremendously to  get through the first trimester anxiety and fears, I am blessed to have discovered a practitioner that specializes in EFT for pregnancy and birth and I plan to use her again.

Lately I’ve been losing my appetite quite a bit, part of it is the hot weather but it seems that part of it is the occasional blues, I noticed that lately when I get hormonal I don’t get bitchy, I just get sad and when I do, I can’t eat.  I’ve stopped watching most videos online because I never know when something usually funny will make me cry instead and that is not a good excuse to not eat.  Even commercials on TV can trigger waterworks.

I  need to resume my food diary to keep better track of my intake, I’ve been having good nutritional days and bad nutritional days.  Yesterday was a bad one with breakfast being the only real meal and everything else being small snacks as I had no appetite.  My hunger returned at 3am and would not let me sleep so I’m trying to make up for it today, so far I am doing way better in the intake department.

Speaking of foods, hubby introduced me to my new favorite healthy snack “buddy fruit”, it’s quick, convenient, easy, no high fructose corn syrup or other stuff that grosses me out.  Since we only go to the grocery store twice a month we do not have the luxury of having fresh fruit on hand everyday, this is something that I’ll probably stock up on as b-day approaches.

A pregnant friend on Facebook was showing me pictures of the diaper cakes that she hopes she gets at her baby shower, good for her.  On my part, although I don’t expect gifts from anyone, I know that some people will feel inclined to get something for baby Fox so I must clarify to avoid any oops situations.  We are not using disposable diapers so PLEASE do not get us a diaper cake. The thought will be appreciated but the gift would end up being donated to charity or a mom in need.  If I do end up using a disposable diaper at some point you can bet that it won’t be any of the brands that diaper cakes use.

They do sell cloth diaper cakes but they are more expensive since the diapers are not thrown away after a couple of hours of use and nobody needs to go through that expense, if you really want to help with diapers, get us a gift certificate to CottonBabies.com or GreenMountainDiapers.com, or Etsy.com the last 2 sites is where I’ve blown most of my paycheck so far.

Yes, I admit that I have developed an obsession with cute cloth diapers.  Etsy is dangerous for this!

So far we have a decent stash to start with, we have:

• 1 dozen cotton prefolds- newborn size
• 1 dozen unbleached cotton prefolds- infant size
• 6 diaper covers- (5 small, 1 one size)
• 2 fitted diapers- infant size
• 15 Bumgenius one size pocket diapers
• 1 Fuzzibuns pocket diapers size small

So we can easily get started with this, it would be good to have another dozen or 2 of prefolds to not have to wash everyday, specially during the newborn stage when baby will go through about 12 diapers per day so I hope to order more before Baby Fox’s arrival.

Below is a sample of the designs that we have so far to illustrate how easy it is to go overboard with the thousands of cute designs available out there.

Those that know me know that I love anything and everything with dragonflies so it’s no surprise that I become obsessed with dragonfly baby stuff.  I HAD to get the dragonfly diaper cover in the picture above, it matches the diaper pail liner and wet bag, all that I am missing is the darned portable changing pad to have the complete set.

Everywhere that I look it’s out of stock, even from the manufacturer.  Green Mountain Diapers seem to think that they will get some again but not for at least 2 months.  So if in your travels you come accross a Mommy’s Touch Diaper Changing Pad in the Flights of Fancy design please let me know ASAP as you’ll make this mama very happy.

I was amused to discover that Huggies has released a jean disposable diaper product

Does it look cute? yes, would I buy it? no.  I can always get a WAHM in Etsy to make me jean cloth diapers if I really wanted.  When I see this I wonder if disposable diaper companies are trying to capitalize on the cute potential that cloth diapers used to be the only one able to offer…

On other news, I am able to hold bowls and glasses on the belly, amusing and convenient but potentially messy when baby decides to kick it off.

Here is a crappy shot of the week 30 belly, it’s what we get when taking a quick picture early in the morning when leaving for work but it will had to do until next time.

In the past week it seemed like my belly dropped overnight, the usual kicks are now felt a couple of inches lower and there is the extra bladder pressure making for more frequent trips to the bathroom.  I tend to be fine while sitting, but if I lie down, stand or walk I feel like I have to go at all times, add to that the fact that baby refuses to allow me to sleep past 8am on my days off and I end up already missing sleep.

You know that you’re really tired when everybody you work with starts commenting on how tired you look and how much slower you’re walking. Yes, ever since the seeming “belly drop” I find that although I have more lung capacity, there has been a shift in weight that slows down my walking and I just end up dragging feet. But I keep on moving… at least at work, at home I don’t want to move unless I must!

So the latest at work is people trying to predict the gender by how my belly looks. There is no consensus, some are convinced that I’m having a girl because I’m carrying high, others say that I’m having a boy because I’m carrying narrow.  If there was any accuracy to this people would not pay for ultrasounds to find out the gender so I mostly ignore the predictions.

On an online birth community that I visit there is a very active thread where pregnant women confess the bad things that they are doing/ have done in pregnancy.  I am no pregnant saint but I must admit that I’m doing pretty darn good compared to the mothers that have never taken a prenatal vitamin, drink coffee and soda daily and haven’t quit smoking.  Prenatal vitamins is something that I’m actually very religious about.

These are the confessions that I was able to come up with:

1. I confess that I am dreading hearing everyone say, “sleep while you can, because you’ll never sleep again.” I want baby to be well fed, clean diaper, and loved…but I am NOT looking forward to running on 2-3 hours of sleep at a time.
2. I have no motivation to keep up with a prenatal yoga or a kegel routine
3. As much as I try, I don’t always drink as much water as I should, specially on hot days
4. I confess that I’ve been slacking on the nutrition department, particularly on the veggies and fruit every day aspect, some days I also don’t meet  the number of calories that I should be consuming
5. I’ve eaten more desserts and sweet foods in the past 5 months than in the past 5 years combined. Thank goodness I passed the gestational diabetes test.

So my biggest sin is nutrition and that is something that I am aware of and working on fixing. It hasn’t been a problem all pregnancy long either, I actually did very well during the first trimester and most of the second so I know that I can do it again.

Puerto Rican Breastfeeding PSA-  Giving breast is giving life

But I’m GLAD that I’m not pregnant in Puerto Rico, with a 48% C-section rate and 20% pre-term birth rate (highest in the US and apparently highest in the world) I feel like the scary odds in Florida are way easier to deal with. I am a C-section baby and there are several preemies in my family but until I saw this article I didn’t know the epidemic rate of these.

Let me say, I’m absolutely thrilled about this baby.  But when it comes to babies in general, I’m just NOT a “baby person.”

People see my bump and seem to automatically want me to hold their baby.  Listen, they’re all adorable babies, but I don’t know what to do with it!  I feel so put on the spot, like just because I am pregnant I am supposed to form a magical bond with this little guy and I’m just not built that way.  I think my biggest trigger for anxiety is having the poor baby start crying simply because I’m not it’s mommy, embarrassing.

I used to have that gift as a teen, kids just LOVED me, they would love to be with me, I would tolerate being with them, then I forgot all of the skills that I gained from baby sitting, lol. I thought maybe now that I AM pregnant I would get more pleasure out of holding random babies, but I was wrong.

I noticed that I’m not even good at the “baby talk and funny faces” interactions that people do with babies, maybe because I see babies as having a more developed (and currently learning) brain than that and I don’t want to insult their intelligence. Now give me a kitten and I’ll be the queen of baby talk and funny faces, lol.

Please tell me I’m not alone.  Am I the only one that doesn’t really like playing with random babies?? I do expect to get unlimited pleasure out of holding our baby, I look forward to wearing him/her often.

Speaking of baby wearing… I have figured out how to make own carrier and save $40, it’s simply a matter of going to Joann’s fabric and getting 5 yards of the fabric of choice. Years ago I gave up on trying to hem anything, sowing machines recoil in fear at my mere presence, and automatically jam at my touch; besides, overlock looks pretty cool in this case. Who owns a serger and knows how to use it?

The process looks so easy for someone that can cut and hem or serge fabric, if I can figure that last part of the process out I may then have to worry about going crazy and having too many different types of fabric, then you can BET that the baby will have at least one tie dye and at least 1 dragonfly wrap, lol.

On other news, it’s cool that Baby Fox is being more responsive to the outside world, I have discovered that he/she has a very strong opinion (don’t know if it’s positive or negative) about action scenes in movies, there was a LOT of kicking and movement while watching Iron Man 2 at the theater last weekend.

My tolerance to heat seems to be dropping at the same pace that the temperatures are increasing, freaking great. I don’t want to run the A/C all day, I used to only run it to sleep but lately I find myself having to turn it on for a few minutes here and there. I can’t drive during the day without using the A/C. Trying to just grin and bear the heat yields a tired, uncomfortable and cranky Bandora, not a good combo. I also end up losing my appetite, not a good thing when lately I seem to be having trouble eating enough. I will just have to brace myself for a higher than average electric bill over the next few months.

Daddy Fox got to put his ear against the bump and hear baby’s heartbeat! Combine that with the belly kisses he gives and my heart just melts every time. Can I get an “aaaawwww”?

While at a local consignment store the clerk was enthusiastically talking to me about her cloth diapering experience when I noticed her have a slip of the tongue and described formula-fed, disposable-diaper clad babies as “regular”. She caught herself and self corrected but it immediately pointed out to me how it seems that society at large seems to consider formula and disposables as normal while cloth diapers and breastfeeding are considered “fringe” and a rarity.

We’ve gotten a good start to our cloth diaper supply, I currently have 1 dozen newborn size prefold diapers and a couple of covers to go with them. I will probably get another dozen or so to avoid having to do laundry on a daily basis since we still don’t have a washer at our house. I also got 15 used Bumgenius one-size diapers to be used as baby Fox outgrows the newborn size diapers.

I will continue to keep my eyes open for used cloth diapers to expand inventory and have a wider variety and flexibility. Trying to stay away from Etsy where there are way too many cute options for handmade diapers and covers, I did break down and order 1 baby ninja and 1 tie dye cover but will try to aim for more used.

It sucks that I’m just not crafty when it comes to sewing, I have come across several patterns online along with cute prints and fabrics at the store.

What is it with the spike in crib recalls lately? it makes me not want to bother looking at cribs, it seems like it’s only a matter of time before it gets recalled. And then people complain about co-sleeping.

Now that I am 10 weeks away I’m thinking more about life post bump. I do continue to plan on blogging but the blog name will obviously have to change, I am open to suggestions on what to call it!

I do stop and thing about the first few days of official mommy hood and a concern that immediately comes to mind is how to handle the visitor situation. Just because I may feel like a hermit doesn’t mean that I should deprive the world of the awesomeness that is baby Fox but at the same time I don’t expect to be in the mood for visitors for the first 5 days or so but since people will want to visit the baby and not me I’m willing to work out a compromise.  I already talked this out with hubby, no non-family visitors for the first 2 weeks and no unannounced visitors on any day.

I’m truly hoping that people will be busy ogling over the baby that I’ll just get a hi, congratulations and bye.  I do not want to deal with the “how are you feeling?”, “how is the baby sleeping?”, “how is breastfeeding”, “was labor hard?” and any other variation of questions, also do not expect to be in the mood to recount the birth story unless it’s on my terms and whenever I feel like it, that’s why I blog.

Perhaps I should have a waiver prepared for people to sign before they can make it through the door.

“By visiting during the early post-partum period I agree to focus most of my attention on baby and daddy and although I will acknowledge mom’s existence I will not burden her with questions and limit my verbal interactions with her to normal, everyday conversation unless she takes the initiative to change the subject.

If I fail to do so I agree to relinquish my visiting rights effective immediately and will have to see baby via Facebook photos until the post-partum period is over.”

I really don’t want it to come to that but I know what I’m like when I’m not hormonal so I can not imagine how the first postpartum days will be like. Visitors beware!

I am also starting to think about is daycare options. I haven’t done any visits to any places yet, just internet research and talking to a couple of people for referrals. So far it’s discouraging having to deal with sticker shock at the huge cost that will take up a big chunk out of my paycheck and trying to find a place that is safe, clean, nurturing and open minded to cloth diapers. The more I look, the more repulsed that I become by actual centers, I may need to be looking into home based daycare soon.

That’s the disadvantage of having family living an ocean away, I can’t just do what my mom did with me and pay have work from home aunt to take care of me when I was little.

No new belly pictures yet, hoping to fix that this weekend.

I do apologize if this blog entry seems more erratic and disjointed than usual, I am tired and my thinking is just as fragmented…

This morning I learned that baby can kick your diaphragm in such a way to make you start coughing, how fun!

So in the span of a couple of weeks I’ve gone from big to tiny or so people say.  The predominant theme this week is how I’m “all belly” and no fat.  I even had a coworker compare me to Heidi Klum as the only other pregnant woman he’s ever seen whose face, arms, and body in general didn’t change.  I think it has changed, my thighs, arms and rear are larger but they are not gigantic.

Speaking of big bellies, I’m really liking how my belt tattoo looks with the big belly, considering that I got the tattoo years ago when I never planned to have children I must say it looks better now and it frames the bump very nicely.

I can understand the “all belly” comments though as when I look in the mirror my “bump to body size” ratio is more pronounced than in women that tend to have more general padding and whose bump is partially hidden by that padding.

Now that I’m seeing my midwife every 2 weeks instead of once a month I have a regular reminder that we’re entering the final stretch so I need to stop thinking about what I need and start getting it.  I don’t have the luxury of blowing a fortune in one shopping trip so I have to shop smart and in installments.

This week I invested in the beginnings of our cloth diaper supply.  Ordered 15 used Bumgenius All in One diapers from a coworker’s friend.  Ordered the first dozen of newborn size cotton pre-fold diapers and 2 WAHM diaper covers, 1 in newborn size and 1 small.  I’m hopping to get a little bit more every 2 weeks from now on so that we will have a decent startup supply for baby Fox’s July arrival.

Another major investment was in our co-sleeper bassinet, I knew the model we wanted for months, it attaches to the bed mattress allowing for co-sleeping/easy baby access without space restrictions or danger to baby.  It works as a standalone bassinet and folds down compactly into a carrying bag making it excellent for camping.

While checking out one of the consignment stores in the area I came across 3 of them!  The hardest part was choosing from the 3 colors that they had, so now we have baby’s first sleeping space for 55% less than retail.  It’s in like new condition with the mattress still in it’s original plastic packaging, I just need to clean a couple of stains on the frame fabric from people touching it at the store, nothing some oxyclean can’t fix.

I have noticed how my brain has already rewired itself into mommy brain, I no longer feel inclined in shopping for anything for myself but just love any excuse to shop for baby.  A dangerous shopping instinct for the wallet!

Today I was impressed when I got the e-mail newsletter from the people that wrote the “What to Expect when you’re Expecting” book, normally it’s full of the same mainstream information you find most places so I was pleasantly shocked when one of the articles in today’s newsletter was on how to prepare for a homebirth, sweet!

It recently dawned on me that there is a new holiday in my realm of awareness, Mother’s Day.  I recently got my first mother’s day card that didn’t come from a cat or other pet and I admit, I got misty eyed.

In the education front, we have our first childbirth class in just over a week, I finished reading the highly recommended “Birthin from Within”  I liked it but I disagree with it’s stance on breastfeeding.  It tells you to “train” baby to drink from a bottle while breastfeeding “just in case” you want to do something selfish like go out on a date.  Ok, it was exactly worded that way but it did use the date as an example of why you want to give a bottle to your baby, wtf?  I’m not against dating my husband but I don’t want to introduce something I’d otherwise avoid and that can cause nipple confusion just so that we can have an adult dinner.

Yes, baby Fox will have to learn to use a bottle but that is so that I can go back to work, I don’t see a need to start any earlier than that.

I have broken down and subscribed to Mothering magazine, it’s the only pregnancy/parenting magazine that remotely aligns with my granola mama style.  I got a free digital subscription so I was able to immediately read the current issue and was instantly reassured of it being the right choice when the cover’s headline was about cloth diapers and browsing through the pages yielded advertising from companies that I’m actually interested in and whose products I would buy.

Camping in Florida’s May weather while in the third trimester, not for the faint of heart!

It was trying at times but overall it was manageable and some parts were not horrible.  I don’t recommend it to women that don’t enjoy/are used to camping though.  You really have to appreciate camping to want to stick it out.

What sucked about camping:

-  fire ants- I don’t know if being pregnant makes me look sugar coated to ants but those B!+@&#s just loved biting my toes.  Even when I made sure I moved my chair to an area with no visible ant hills within a 6 foot radio they still managed to find me and bite me.  My husband sitting right next to me was ignored by the ants.

- heat- OMG the HEAT!  I already overheat easily thanks to the little furnace that is baby Fox.  The first day was in the upper 80′s with a slight breeze, uncomfortable but manageable.  The second day we had 97 degrees plus heat index and I was MISERABLE!

having to rest after walking "uphill" exhausted and overheated

- dehydration- Even though I always had a refillable mug with water, I was not drinking fast enough to replenish and ended up dehydrated on Saturday, boo.

- walking uphill-  I managed the walking rather well most of the time, our campsite was uphill from most places that we would go to and getting there wasn’t such a problem, it was getting back that became a pain in the rear, or more precisely, hips.  Thankfully this is Florida so it’s not quite a hill but there is definitely an incline to be walked and I never did well in that part.

- people- The usual  “how are you feeling?” and the “poor thing, this heat must be torture“  (thanks for stating the obvious).
By Saturday night the heat exhaustion, dehydration, swelling and general discomfort had taken such a toll on me that I felt like I snapped emotionally so I decided on  self imposed isolation to protect people from snappy comebacks that are undeserved when they were just trying to be nice.

- belly rubbers- despite my t-shirt people risked getting their ass kicked and rubbed anyway, some were sneaky about it, as if I wouldn’t notice!  The sad realization that I’ve arrived to is that belly rubbers= baby cheek squeezers so poor baby Fox is in trouble when he meets our friends.

- cankles- yep! despite minor swelling I hadn’t really experienced this… until this trip!  I actually had rolls on my ankles when bending my foot! My feet were so swollen they wouldn’t fit on any shoes.  This has gone down quite a bit but I still have some rather pronounced swelling.

it's early in the day and I already lost most definition between my calves and ankles, this is nothing compared to how bad it was by the end of the weekend

- belly insect bites-  besides the ants I wasn’t really bothered by any insects but some flying sucker thought he was getting a 2 for 1 deal by biting my belly.  It’s definitely a different type of itching than the stretching skin itch that I have gotten used to.

What helped make the camping experience bearable:

- trolley- thankfully the festival has a golf cart trolley that saved me from having to walk uphill as many times as I otherwise would have.

- misting tent- my favorite place in the whole campsite, really should have set one up at our encampment.  Whereas in the past, spending 30 seconds inside the misting tent would have given me chills in 90+ degree weather, this time around spending minutes inside just made me feel like I was melting at a slower rate.  I still credit it with preventing me from fainting more than once.

In the misting tent- first time I let the belly "hang out" in public

- the breeze- it wasn’t constant but so very much appreciated when it graced me with its touch.

- clouds- not always there but always welcomed the break form the beating sun.

- boppy pillow-  Sleeping on the floor was  still uncomfortable but not impossible thanks to this pillow.

- the lake- discovered too late that just dipping my feet in the lake made a world of difference with the heat.  Didn’t bring bathing suit so I couldn’t jump in.

Things I would do differently now that I know better:
- bring bathing suit- the lake would have then become my favorite place in the campground

- bring camping chair with footrest- no idea why I didn’t bring it this time, it would have greatly helped my swollen feet and made it harder for the ants from Hades to find my toes.

- bring a walking stick- would have made the walk uphill easier and less of a waddle

- bring frozen juiceboxes, popsicles or similar frozen somethings- it would have helped me cool down faster and fight dehydration better than warm water alone

- bring extra clothes-  belly snapped the elastic on my skirt the first day and I had to get creative to keep it from falling off completely until I got back to camp.  That threw off my whole wardrobe plan as I didn’t bring a lot of extra changes in clothes besides what I thought I needed.

Funny stuff
- the drum circle was lame at times but when the beat got good baby would dance to the drums, it was cute.

-”your face hasn’t changed!?“- this one came as a shock, I didn’t know that my face was supposed to change while pregnant.

-”Oh my god you’re fat!“-  I heard this more than once from people that hadn’t seen me in 6 months and didn’t know I was pregnant.  It really didn’t bother me, I actually found it amusing.

week 28 belly and yes I'm wearing my fox tail

In summary, would I camp again while pregnant?  Depends on the weather, definitely not again in this pregnancy as it just gets progressively hotter.  I would imagine that camping in January would be a lot more enjoyable.

I’m not sick!

That’s my new standard response to the very popular and oh so annoying “how are you feeling?” question.

Am I always comfortable and fine? no, do I feel sick because of it? no, do I want to talk about my discomforts with you? again, no.  Do I want to rant about the same discomforts in my blog? that’s what blogs are for!

This week I’d like to NOT welcome hip pain to the host of other interruptions to my attempts at sleeping at night. I hope you don’t make yourself too comfortable hip pain, you’ll be fighting with pelvic pain, trips to the bathroom, back ache, leg cramps and baby’s kicks for my attention while I attempt to sleep.

Sleep has surely become more challenging lately, even with snack and bathroom interruptions I used to be able to sleep through most of the night, not so much anymore.  I wish we had a bigger bed too, I’m limited in the range of movement and positions that I can try.

Gone are the days where I could sleep in late on my days off, it’s not the aches that get me out of bed, it’s horrible hunger and the fact that baby, like his daddy, is an early riser and will be kicking up a storm until I go vertical, my belly doesn’t have a snooze button.

I’m fortunate that the bulk of the discomforts occur at night and I tend to feel pretty good during the day.  Yes, I now run out of breath walking from my desk to the copier at work but I was warned about the reduced lung capacity so I’m not concerned by it.

Plus I I now feel like I’ve officially entered that stage where I’m overheated most of the time, just in time for the arrival of Florida’s spring!  This is a piece of cake now, I’ll let you know how it goes in July when we’re in the summer time and the little furnace is bigger…

Baby is now head down so that explains why I haven’t had any tap dancing in my cervix for a while, thank goodness.  But with it now comes the fact that sometimes baby will press on my sciatic nerve, fun!  Thankfully it has only happened once and for only a few hours but what a pain in the rear… literally.

I received a link to a website that offers a lot of free stuff pregnancy and baby stuff in exchange for spam. Not a big deal as I have an e-mail address designated for spam only that I could use in the name of free stuff. What shocked me is how there wasn’t a single free offer on that website that appealed to me.

I could get a substantial discount on a 3d ultrasound, free formula, free disposable diapers and all sorts of other items that are not in my shopping list, yes I need a diaper bag but I don’t want a big Enfamil logo on it. I’m sure that this website would be considered a jackpot to a mainstream mom but it makes me wonder if someone out there has thought to do something similar for crunchy mamas. How about slings, cloth diapers and nursing pads?

And speaking of diaper bags, why are they so freaking expensive?  Aren’t they glorified purses?  I need to go to the store and carefully look at one inside and out to see what makes them so freaking special.  I read about how some of them have special compartments and such but even those that don’t have the special features cost close to $100.

Daddy Fox and I agreed to be practical and aim for a neutral black backpack style diaper bag, I’m just as happy with a rainbow tie dye beach tote but it’s only fair for daddy to be able to feel manly carrying the bag.  I just wish that I could find a decent one that doesn’t give me sticker shock.  The diaper dude bags are just as expensive and uninteresting as all the other ones.  I did find one that I liked and is half the cost of most other diaper bags and it doesn’t have a formula company’s logo on it.  So that will have to do.

Found out that my midwife can prepare my placenta for encapsulation, all I need to do is fill the gelcaps myself, deal!

A friend of mine had her baby yesterday and less than an hour after the birth she was posting announcements and pictures online.  I’m sure that the fact that she had an all natural birth helped with her not needing as much recovery time.  I can totally see myself twittering/Facebooking from my cell phone after the initial bonding session, not saying that I will… but who knows…

all together now... aaaawwwww

And since cloth diapers seems to be the most interesting topic in all of the Bump Chronicles…  Not that I have to justify my decisions to anyone but to set the record straight… The following are myths:

• I love doing laundry, and thus have chosen cloth diapers because I just can’t get enough of washing and folding stuff all day every day.
• I like poop.

The first one I endure,  and although my husband will argue that I have a butt obsession,  the second one I am willing to endure but it doesn’t come close to liking.

The above are not why we’re cloth diapering, hope you can all go back to restful sleep now.

I want to honor 2 friends that had their babies this week, one in the hospital, the other one at home.  Both 10 pounds and change giant babies, kudos!  Speaking of giant babies, at our midwife appointment this week she commented at least 3 times on our “big baby”, she didn’t mean it as a bad thing at all but the fact that she said it more than once did make me wonder… will I have to push a 10 pound giant out?

Too soon to tell.

I was having a conversation about homebirth with a person I met in an online mothering forum and she asked me if my appeal was the romantic fact that I could have candles, soft music and wear a pretty flowing robe while having our baby.  That is emphatically NOT the reason why.

Yes, it would be cool to have such a cool image of home birth but I want to be realistic.  Yes there may be music, it could be drumming, it could be Enya, I may want silence… I have no freaking clue what I will want as labor can’t be strictly planned, I can only imagine what I would like.

Yes there may be candles (although christmas lights seem kinda cool too) but I don’t see myself wearing a flowing robe and looking all relaxed.  Maybe during early labor.

If I wear anything it’ll be an old oversized tshirt and I expect that once things get active it’ll be time to get to work and I’ll look the part, why else would it be called labor?

I don’t doubt that some people out there have been able to have this idyllic version of homebirth and it would be awesome if I did too but I’m not putting all of my eggs on that basket.  I think it will help that I’m not walking into the homebirth with romantic illusions of it being easy and “pretty”, I’d rather not set myself up for disappointment.

On other news, I didn’t realize that I was still subscribed to the newsletter for the obstetric practice that I saw for all of 1 appointment last year.  They were asking for contact from parents that they delivered babies for.  Are Obstetricians now UPS/Fedex?  I know that the word deliver is very common in the field but as someone that believes strongly in the power of words I find it disempowering for most women who are seen as being delivered of their babies rather than them birthing their babies, I guess that’s why I like it when midwives talk about being baby catchers.  I’ll step off this soap box before I write a book on the subject.

Sorry, no belly picture this week.  No heartbeat recording either, we did listen to the heartbeat on Tuesday but technical difficulties with hubby’s cellphones didn’t allow us to capture much.

I expect to be able to post new bump pictures in the next update after we return from camping this weekend where I hope to have some photos taken by the lake.

So after a first trimester that seemed to have lasted a year (probably due to near constant morning sickness and anxiety), the second trimester zoomed by me so fast that the third trimester snuck up on me without warning! It still feels like 2 weeks ago that I entered the 2nd trimester.

I guess I should have seen it coming, I had noticed that the “walk in the park” comfortable second trimester hadn’t been so comfortable lately with increased back aches, swelling feet and other minor inconveniences. Despite having woken up in the middle of the night crying in pain from the horrible leg cramp from hades in which my muscle cramped in 3 different places simultaneously radiating pain into one uber painful spot and leaving me sore for hours… I’m not tired of being pregnant. I actually feel that this experience is flashing before my eyes in a blur and I’m not being able to experience it fully.

I’m sure that I’ll write the opposite in another Bump Chronicle a few months from now but I think that’s part of the natural progression of things.

Now everybody says “the baby will be here soon!”, “you’re in the home stretch!” and all other sorts of upbeat encouraging comments except my brain is not accepting them as encouraging because all that my brain sees is the fact that the clock is ticking and we’re not ready!

Granted, ready is a big word with many facets of definition. In my brain’s current definition of the word it isn’t so bad. By not ready it means that we don’t have a lot of the essential baby supplies, we don’t have a nursery setup, the house is still a mess with moving boxes and stuff that hasn’t yet been arranged in its final place and other petty stuff like that… All which can be fixed with plenty of time to spare if I get enough energy to get of my @$$. Even if it doesn’t get done it’s not the end of the world. So what if the nursery isn’t setup? Baby won’t be sleeping there for a while, so what if we don’t have most supplies we need? Thanks to grandma Fox baby won’t be naked or cold, diapers can be procured on short notice and most other items are luxuries meant for comfort and cuteness and not true basic necessities.

Am I ready psychologically? Who the heck knows? My answer to that is that I am as ready as I can be and I feel that it is ready enough. Is daddy Fox ready? you’ll have to ask him, excitement and anticipation are not in any short supply in that front.

A male friend online was having a debate on his wall about how cloth diapers aren’t good for the environment because of the energy needed to be used to launder them. Since several people were already involved in the debate I just scanned from the sidelines and moved on with my day without dipping my spoon in that pot but I do feel the need to point out in my own personal forum that yes, I know that extra laundry uses extra energy and water, I have already budgeted the cost of purchasing carbon offsets for the extra energy use, I still feel that a reusable diaper is a better choice than a disposable that after one use will clog up a landfill for generations to come.

And no, I don’t need anybody else to agree with or support my decision as long as my husband and baby are onboard. I don’t believe in “one size fits all” solutions for anything in life and after all I’m sure that the employees at Pampers, Huggies, etc appreciate those people keeping their kids fed.

It’s unrealistic of me to hope that 100% of people will want to switch to cloth and many of them have very good reasons for it besides laziness or ignorance. I like the fact that companies like Seventh Generation, Tushies and gDiapers are trying to bring more earth friendly disposable options but they aren’t fully there yet. What I do hope is that enough people do consider their options to send a message to the disposable companies that they have a monetary incentive to research and develop disposable products that are better for the landfill and for babies’ health.

I want to point out that I fully endorse my friend’s (and everybody else’s) right to express their opinion regardless of my agreement with it. What I don’t endorse is making statements along the lines of “people that don’t agree with me are wrong/need to change their ways”. I have blogged many a times about friends that are taking approaches to life that are radically different than mine and shared my opposing opinion but I have never implied or stated that I think they should change their mind or do otherwise. I guess it all boils down to live and let live.

So now on to the next controversial topic…. placenta encapsulation. I have been looking into this for some time and the more I do, the more I want it. Please keep the “that’s cannibalistic” or “that’s gross” comments to yourself. Like everything else in life, it’s not for everyone. Either research it and be informed or keep your disgust to yourself. Information can be found at http://placentabenefits.info.

Most people don’t give the placenta a second thought after birth, they just know it disappears never to be seen again, usually in the garbage. I knew from day one that I didn’t want that. The placenta holds a lot of spiritual symbolism and significance due to its current physical purpose and I want to honor that.

At first I was considering making placenta prints since they look cool but I found that messy and empty. I first casually read about how the Chinese eat their placenta and was amused but uninterested. It wasn’t until I was directly asked about my placenta plans a few months ago that I started to give it a lot of thought.

The more I talk to other moms that have done it, the more interested I become in doing it. I don’t care so much about having the “great pregnancy hair” longer but the “more energy, increased milk supply and no post-partum depression” are definite selling points when I hear other’s personal stories. So far I haven’t found a local person that offers the service but it looks easy enough as a DIY project with access to a food dehydrator. I’m not sure if I want to get that up close and personal with my placenta preparation but it would certainly be a cheap way to do it, about $6 for the capsules and about $20 to buy an used dehydrator on Craigslist or Goodwill if I can’t find one to borrow.

Next week will be baby’s first camping trip, I have no experience camping while in the third trimester so I expect that this will be a more laid back experience. I’m not particularly concerned except for how my back will handle sleeping on the floor. This time more than ever I am hoping for friendly weather.

So apparently I have too much on my mind for just one weekly post; plus, we finally have an updated bump picture…

I get annoyed when intelligent, forthright, modern women say that their baby’s father would not let them have a homebirth. Oh. What else won’t he let you do? Which other bodily functions of yours does he get to decide on? Just curious. I really wish that they took some personal responsibility for their decisions and stop trying to find a scapegoat because they don’t want to admit that they are scared of the unknown and get comfort in knowing that the obstretrical industrial complex is ready to intervene in their birth… or whatever other reason they may have (which is valid as long as it feels valid to them).

I find it interesting that I have many pregnant friends at the moment. In Facebook alone I can count 6 off the top of my head and they’re all having vastly different approaches to pregnancy and birth starting with the scheduled c-section and ultrasound at every prenatal, moving down to the one hoping for natural birth at a hospital, the one seeing the midwife at the birth center and the one that some would consider more radical than I who is planning an unassisted homebirth and not having any ultrasounds. They’re all still my friends and even if I personally do things a different way I support them and wish them the best in their chosen journey.

I don’t loose sleep if you don’t want a homebirth, I won’t judge you for wanting to be in a hospital. It takes a bit more effort to hold back from judging when someone is for having an “epidural with their name on it” as soon as the first contraction hits without ever attempting to see for how long they can manage naturally. Or scheduling that induction/c-section for a specific day because that’s your BFF’s birthday and how cool it would be for baby to share it or because it’s convenient or because your brother starts school the next week or insert other excuse for not allowing baby to decide when his/her birthday will be but even then I won’t push my opinions down on you (I’ll just generally rant in here, lol) and I would appreciate it if others would show the same respect.

When people say, “You sure are brave for having a homebirth…” I am? I don’t see it that way…bravery in physiological, natural childbirth? Somehow, I don’t link that to bravery, only normalcy. I don’t think bravery has anything to do with it.

On the other hand, I do tend to think that a woman is brave for willingly entering a hospital with a 32% (or higher) cesarean rate, hoping for the luck of the draw on their “chosen” care provider, fending off “routine” procedures and protocol that lack evidence to support their need, having to guard one’s personal regions from an episiotomy, being told how and when to push, and asking permission to see your baby when it’s born. It takes a brave person to willingly endure that (and more) in my opinion. Staying home is easy; I only have to deal with myself and my issues.

I get annoyed as well when it is assumed that I am going for some drug free, natural birthing record (does this exist?); as in, “It’s not a contest to see if you can have a drug free birth.” Uhh, I never said it was, nor did I say that that was my motivation for not wanting drugs. Yep, I must be this way because I want to suffer. Me the biggest wimp when it comes to pain, feel the need to face my biggest fear without pharmaceutical backup just so that people can say “look at her!”. Whatever happened to the more important reasons such as the physical and psychological advantages to both mother and child? Go ahead and judge me for wanting to reduce the risk of complication (and therefore interventions) and get parenthood off to the most optimal bonding start.

But these people are everywhere. Negative, “just get the drugs”, “what are you trying to prove”, “that’s why drugs are invented”, “do everyone a favor and just do it like everyone else”, blah blah blah blah. It’s so freaking annoying.

Until I started to seek out the natural birth/homebirth community and met like minded people that HAVE done it; I could count on one hand (and have fingers left over) the number of encouraging, “you can do it”, “childbirth isn’t so bad”, stories I heard during pregnancy. One.

Lately I have been toying with the concept of Elimination Communication aka “EC”, some of you will say “EC what?”. This is essentially a diaper free baby. You learn to watch for baby’s cues about an impending “release” and you just hold him/her over a bowl or toilet. Most parents report few if no accidents or “misses”.

When I first came across this concept I thought it was too far out, even for my offbeat ways. But a few months later I came across a blog posting from a friend that I respect on how it worked for her. By the time I came across her post I had been desensitized from the initial shock a few months prior and felt that if this neat freak that loses it over bodily secretions easier than I do can do it, then I could have the potential to do it as well (and she’s proud of the neat freak title so don’t think I am insulting her).

My research so far is exciting, many cultures have (and still) use EC and it is a form of ancient childcare. I particularly like the less laundry of cloth diapers and the more air flow to baby’s bum= lower risk of diaper rash. Plus baby is potty trained way faster because they’re already used to letting you know when they have to go.

I’m not saying that I’m definitely going the EC route and if I do it won’t be full time but I find that it would be great for times when I’m hanging out with baby alone and can be paying attention to the signals without distractions. There is a book that I’m looking to get The Diaper Free Baby to see if this will be at least a partial fit for me.

I fully know that if I do decide to go this route I will face another round of skepticism, judgment and criticism from family and friends but as you all know that is nothing new to me and other’s opinions have never changed my previous decisions so why start now?

I will continue to base my decisions on research and experience and not what others think I “should” do. If this topic got your attention at all you may want to check out the 75 Benefits of Elimination Communication

On a more physical angle, insomnia is trying to become a nightly visitor. I’ll either have trouble falling asleep even though I’m too tired to even read or I’ll wake up after a couple of hours and lie awake until close to sunrise when I’m finally able to sleep again but not for long as I then have to get up for work.

I’m also going through hunger cycles, some days I’ll eat normally spaced/ moderate sized meals and other days I’ll be so hungry that I can’t make it through the night without snacking. As I write this I’m on my second bowl of cereal because my brain didn’t seem to register the first one.

My belly button is trying to pop out, I guess there isn’t that much tissue in there for the typical “turkey timer pop out” as it mainly looks stretched out and flat, lol.

I’ve also noticed today that I’ve got a “waddle” walk thing going, weird…. I guess it would make sense since my belly does feel rather heavy and my center of gravity is completely shifted.

And finally after 2 weeks of nothing, the latest belly picture. My new name is Gaia, lol

One thing that they should sell is a belly bib. Because of the bump I can’t sit as close to the table as I used to and it’s tricky to lean that far forward when taking a bite of food. Add to that pregnancy clumsiness and my belly ends up catching bits and drips. In the past the napkin at my waist would intercept that and keep my clothes clean but now the bump sticks out enough to intercept the drip before it makes it to the napkin.

I had gotten an e-mail inquiring about the cost breakdown of the cloth diapers that I was thinking about using, here’s how it breaks down if I buy the brands that I have been looking at:

• Using prefolds only up to 5 months of age- $188

• Using prefolds only up to potty training- $351

• Using All in one’s (AIO’s) only- $864 (assumes Bum Genius 3.0 one size diapers) total varies by brand

• Using combination of prefolds and AIO’s- $675 (this figure is higher than apparent because I wouldn’t start AIO’s until I went back to work so I need enough prefolds for full time use during the first 6 weeks or so.)

These assume doing laundry every 3 days and do not include laundry costs which are estimated at $0.025 (just over 2 pennies!) per diaper and include increased water/ electricity usage and detergent)

All of these figures above are the cost of buying enough diaper supplies to last through potty training!

Compare to the use of cloth diaper service through 18 months of age (not daycare friendly)- $1,594

If we use diaper service for first 6 weeks and then move to AIO’s for daycare= $682

Compare this with the cost of disposables through 18 months of age (assuming we potty train by then) at just over $1,600 (Walmart prices on brands I would not consider buying) and you can see why my wallet doesn’t need any convincing on the massive savings.

But we need a washing machine! I wouldn’t be the first person to drive to have to drive to the laundromat to wash dirty diapers but since we don’t have one around the corner and the closest one is not open 24 hours, it requires logistical scheduling to be accomplished soooo…. anybody upgrading their washer and wants to sell their old one cheap?

As I started to think about the birth atmosphere to create at home  it dawned on me that I already have a lot of birth related symbolism around me including an antique statue of Shela Na Gig (sp?), I’ll definitely have to get through the boxes soon and find these statues so that they can be visible on b-day.

Yes it would be great to give birth in my backyard (I can already hear the screams from the birth fundies out there) but let’s face it, it will be July in Florida, at the very least it will be hot and humid and at the most it could be storming and since we don’t have a covered patio… indoors it is!

I just wish that I had the energy and motivation to do a thorough cleaning of the house but my nesting instincts so far seem limited to unpacking boxes, wanting to throw things away and wanting to clear the baby’s room of non-baby stuff even though he/she won’t be sleeping there anytime soon.  If someone were to ask me what I want for my birthday my answer would be “a maid” even if just for one day.

So apparently I’m big for how long I have left to go. Gee thanks. That’s what I’ve been told by one of the managers at work that believes that I’m having a boy because I’m already so big. How big is too big? I have some days when I feel huge but when I look in the mirror it looks average to me. I’d rather take comments about being too big to unsolicited birth horror stories.

As I continue my cloth diaper research I’m leaning towards using prefolds at least during the newborn stage. It’s cheap, it works well and after enough youtube videos and experiments it’s not as hard as some people make it to be. I will still probably end up having to get AIO’s for when I go back to work because whomever ends up taking care of Baby Fox may not agree with the ease of prefolds and AIO’s work just like disposables minus the trash bag part so there shouldn’t be complaints.

I admit that even though I haven’t left work yet I’m already dreading having to go back. I never envisioned myself as a SAHM (Stay at home mom) but that is something that has been really appealing to me until at least 6 months, wanting to breastfeed exclusively without having to pump into bottles plays a big role in that. I wish that the financial logistics would be more supportive of that option but at the moment that is just a dream.

I admit I just bought my first diaper cover, it was an impulse buy while checking out the local consignment store as I was experimenting with the different cloth diaper options they had available and they had this super hippie super soft tie dye cover for cheap, those of you that know me understand that I can’t resist tie dye and a tie dye baby just breaks the cute scale.

On the breastfeeding front, I’m actually kind of excited to be attending our first La Leche League meeting later this month. It sucks that we will have to miss another parenting event to attend but I want Fox to be part of the process so the “Father’s Welcome” meeting is the one I want to go to.

I have discovered a lot of women that at first found my parenting views to be radical because they didn’t know it was even a choice, but after seeing the facts behind them are becoming interested so I’m thinking about compiling a page on this website with a list of resources that have helped me, nothing fancy just some pointers for seeking souls. Let me know whether or not you think I should bother.

I also came across a cool concept while reading on of the blogs that I’m subscribed to (If Breastfeeding offends you, put a blanket over your head) and these are breastfeeding thank you cards.

I will totally print these out and pass out when seeing a woman breastfeeding in public, sadly that is something that I very rarely see so it may take me a while to get through the first sheet.

Sadly there is no new belly pic yet, hubby and I haven’t gotten around to it since he’s the photographer and I don’t like doing the MySpace style “hold the camera in front of the mirror” shots. But I assure you that this baby is boldly going where no baby has gone before as I’m feeling kicks in higher and higher areas…and not to mention stronger.